Sunday, August 3, 2014

Teaching is the crappiest job in the universe.

Can we all just take a minute and peel ourselves away from the end of summer psychosis and admit to one very cold, hard reality? Teaching is, literally, the crappiest job in the universe. Like, pee your pants a little when you pick up a dropped nickel and spill coffee on your brand new, winter white, overpriced, Anthropologie, cashmere sweater crappy.

I know. That's a terrible analogy because what teacher shops at Anthropologie for anything other than a 2oz candle? No teacher.  Which is another great reason why teaching is the crappiest job in the universe.

Exhibit A: These handwritten cards are about as lame as it gets.  I mean, please. The "best" teacher ever? Can someone say, "over-exaggeration"? I mean, truly. Ever. As in, as there ever was. What other job exists where job performance feedback from customers involves two choices: A swift see ya & goodbye, or a note making an outlandish, hyperbolic claim? How is anyone supposed to work like that? You're not.  Quit teaching and find something else that doesn't confuse the psyche.

Exhibit B: These shoes look like they spent a few months in the Cheetah exhibit at the zoo.  Torn and tattered and totally rendered useless, no human sole (pun intended) shall ever bear thier adornment again.  How does a job involving coloring impart so much physical damage to the feet?  And what is the reason behind the total injustice of wearing the formally cloud-like, comfort capsules? There is none. None at all. Jimmy Choo-Who? Not unless you want to claim bankruptcy by Mid-January.

Exhibit C: Enough already with the duties.  I'm sick of going outside and spending all that wasted time in the fresh air and sunshine. Hello, skin cancer! Nice to meet you every Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday from 10:05-10:25! What is wrong with a basic cubicle that protects you from the sun and human contact? Nothing.

  Exhibit D: New 'coworkers' every 11.8 months = a pain in it.  Just when you've gotten the team dynamics completely functional... everyone quits and you're left with a whole new crew of brand new team members who have no idea what they're doing.  "Where's the bathroom?" They ask. "Do you have any pets?" "Do you like Starbucks?" "What's your favorite color?" Oh, pu-lease.  You missed the train by a whole summer, and now I need to completely start over -- and by the way, it's not really that cute at all when you *feign* joyous excitement at the science experiment you've "never done before" or when your force your little face to light up when you finally "get" something. Whatever.  Crap, crap.

Are you with me, or are you with me? Teaching sucks.  

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go set up my room.

After all, I'm the best teacher... ever.

Sunday, June 22, 2014

Oh Baby! It's the June Mystery Box!

It is that time again! Our June semi-mystery box is ready to set sail! The summer season has officially arrived and we are celebrating with some nautical awesomeness. Can I get an "Aye Aye, Captain?"

I know what you're thinking, there is nothing we could give you that could top the satisfaction of spending months away from your gnarly underaged crew! 

That is where you are wrong our friends, think about how your summer could improve if you only had this AWESOME new beach bag from Ooh Baby Designs??

No beach time in your near future? No worries! This bag would also be great for hauling your library books, your rock collection, or your WWE wrestling belt.

Our grand prize winner will receive the bag pictured above from Ooh Baby Designs, AND a MYSTERY box full of summer time goodies, AND . . . a shopping spree in each of our stores. 

Click on any certificate below to visit their TPT store ands scope out your potential choices!

We will also be giving terrific prizes to TWO runner ups! Two lucky teacher friends will receive the digital products pictured below in their digital inbox!

Last month's GRAND prize winner won a $200 Tieks gift card! We also gave away two $100 gift cards! 

To see what was included in previous prizes click, here, here, here, here

Simply complete three easy steps to enter the June Mystery Box Giveaway!

1. Follow
2. Comment
3. Rafflecopter

This month's comment question:

Feel free to copy and paste your answer to this month's question in the comment section on each blog. There is no need to retype every time. Please follow each blog while you are hopping through.

While your clicking through the rafflecopter, be sure to "Like" this month's sponsor, Ooh Baby Designs, on facebook!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

We apologize to our friends from around the globe, but this contest is for US residents only, please.

Nautical graphics in this post were purchased from Little Llama Shoppe. Teacher clipart images in this post were designed by Melonheadz Illustrating.

Saturday, April 26, 2014

April Mystery Box - It's a BIG one!

Happy SPRING, friends! This month is a very exciting month for us Mystery Box gals. We've joined forces with two more our favorite bloggy buddies just in time for some Mystery Box 2014 fun.

And speaking of fun, are you as ready for summer as we are?

We're in the home stretch now friends -- and to celebrate we've got a Mystery Box that will knock your *socks* off (Pun intended).

And if we may say so ourselves, this month's Mystery Box is fabulous!

So very fabulous, in fact, that we can't quite keep this box a total mystery.

But we promise (cross our hearts) that you'll love it just the same.

Yes, loves! You saw that right! This month's Mystery Box features the amazing and fabulous Tieks!
Can you even believe it? We know you can't. But it's true! 
Our Mystery Box grand prize winner will be the lucky
recipient of our...


April Mystery Box!

Inside the grand prize Mystery Box, you'll be excited to find...

Wha what?? Yes friends!! A $200 gift card to spend at Tieks on that pair of ballet flats you've been thinking obsessing about for months!

(We promise to include a couple of other great teacher things, too, which *will* remain a mystery.  Because that's how we roll.)

But there's more to it than an incredibly fabulous teacher-coveted pair of shoes!

Click any certificate below to visit their TpT Store.


****But wait!!****

This month we will have TWO runner ups! Yes, friends. That's right!

Each runner up will win...

Yes!! We're giving away TWO more Tieks gift cards -- each for $100!

You're thinking, "Are you kidding us?"


We never kid about shoes.

That means there are a total of THREE Tieks gift cards ripe for the picking!

And of course, each runner up also wins a totally fabulous product bundle, like always!
$7 gift cert.
Last month's box

The lucky winner selected a year's subscription to Reading A-Z and a year's subscription to Vocabulary A-Z, as well as $10 in digital goodies from each of our bloggers.

When her box came in the mail, this is what was inside...

A happy, happy plate that just sings Spring from the tree tops!!
A matching spreader...
Black, white & pink damask bag with a matching coin pouch....

Are *you* ready for a chance to win in three easy steps? US residents only please.

                                  1. Follow
                                  2. Comment
                                  3. Rafflecopter



So here's your monthly question...

(Besides everywhere!)

Feel free to copy and paste your answer to the question above in the comment section on each blog. There is no need to retype every time. Please follow each blog while you are hopping through. 

     1  34

Ready to enter?


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